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Side-effect
1. I am a 48-year-old married man and was having sex with my wife for the last 20 years using the withdrawl technique for birth control and never failed. I could last as long as I wanted even 10-15 minutes but recently I got myself operated for vasectomy. Since then I have totally lost control and I ejaculate within few seconds. What can be the reason? Is it side effect of Vasectomy or something else. Please advice.
Santosh

Pregnancy issue
2. I am married woman for the last 4 years. Sexual life is very good. Two year back I got pregnant inadvertently and took tablets for abortion. After using the tablets my pregnancy got terminated twice. It happens during 30-40 days of pregnancy. Our medical reports don't show any problems. Please advice.
Rassu

In love with sister-in-law
1. I am in love with my sister-in-law, and she too seems to be in love with me. The problem is that I love my wife too, but I can't live without my sister-in-law. I love her like my wife. Now I am very confused what should I do? Most people tell me that it's just a sexual attraction nad not love but only I know it's not true. I love her too much. My one son also adore her. Even she loves him like her own son. She however tells me not to continue with our affair but I am very confused as I can't leave either of the two ladies.
Ravi Singh
Reply From Dr. Prem Lata Chawla: The note you have written is quite descriptive but you have not clearly specified as to what is your question. You have also not mentioned about the role of your wife over the years in this drama of your being in love with two women at the same time. Does she know about your weakness?  Biologically speaking man by nature is not monogamous. It is entirely possible to love or even lust for more than one woman but the expression of this type of love/lust/passion is strictly prohibited by society. You need not rationalize this love for your sister-in-law by writing about her love for your sons.

I'm afraid of vasectomy
2. I am a 48-year-old married guy with two children. I have had good sexual relationship with my wife of 20 years. The main problem is that she only lets me penetrate her through her thighs, and I wear a condom to prevent the semen flowing on her legs. The reason is that she wants to avoid pregnancy and is neither interested in pills nor in surgery. She wants me to have a vasectomy if I want to come inside her. She does allow me to insert into her vagina only a week before her periods, which is safe. I am not keen on vasectomy as I am afraid that I may lose my sexual potency. Also, when I penetrate inside her vagina, I take almost 20 minutes to ejaculate. Is this normal? Please advise.
S. Kumar
Reply From Dr. Prem Lata Chawla: Vasectomy does not lead to loss of sexual potency. In fact, many men feel that their sex life improves as the fear of pregnancy disappears. It is surprising that an educated man like you carries so much misconception about vasectomy. An internet savvy person like you should have read all about vasectomy and become an expert advising others as well. The ejaculation time varies from person to person and there are no rigid or fixed time frames for the same.