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Secret affair of wife
1. I am a middle-aged man in my 40s. Most of the time, I lived in foreign countries and could give a little time to my wife. I had relationships with a couple of girls time to time. But I haven't informed my wife about it. Now I am planning to settle in India with my wife. I was just wondering if my wife also had relationships outside our marriage. I don't have any problems with that but I want her to accept that. When I asked her if she had any relationship, she refused. But I doubt her claim. How can I find out about her secret affairs? Should I hire a detective or what...please help.
XYZ

'Young wife not happy with me'
2. I am a 42-year-old man married to a 26-year-old girl. I run a shop of my own and am happy with my business. After the death of my first wife, I was single for around 10 years. Then one of my relatives arranged for the match and I accepted it as I was feeling terribly lonely. My new wife although does not seem happy. It appears she was not informed about my age. She talks to me but turns down all my sexual advances. What should I do?
Dayal Singh

I love my cousin
1. I am a 23-year-old girl with lots of failed relationships. I was seeing a guy who was a year younger than me in my school days. I loved him deeply, but he ditched me once we completed our schooling. I was left alone with no friends. I secluded myself to just home and even started avoiding my college. Just when I was started to feel suicidal, another boy who resembled my ex-lover entered my life. He cared for me and vied for my attention. I avoided him as I didn't want to repeat the history of my broken relationship. The guy approached my best friend and she was able to convince me that the relationship would be good for me. I entered the relationship and was happy for a while. But then my bad-luck prevailed and  I found out that the guy was two-timing me. I was heart-broken again as my worst of fears have actually come true. After few months, I met with an accident. When I was lying unconscious on road, a guy helped me reach hospital. He not only informed my parents about the mishap but also visted me from time to time. It took me no time to fall in love with him. I felt that this time the feelings were the strongest. I wrote a letter to him and confessed my love. But sadly he refused to accept my proposal. It took me a month to come out of the shock. All this while, my cousin supported me as he knows me well. He helped me getting over the guilt that I have undergone multiple relationships. I could share with him all the things that I could not share with anybody else. It seems we are made for each other. We think in the same way and I feel a soul connection with him. I proposed to him and he has accepted my proposal. I am happy, but I don't know if it's okay to get married to my cousin.
Amita Dhar
Reply From Dr. Prem Lata Chawla: I don't understand your need for asking this question, as it is well known that there are no cousin marriages amongst Hindus but Muslims allow such marriages. You need not have narrated the whole story of your failed love life for asking this question as failure in love life does not automatically entitle you to marry a cousin in case you are a Hindu and as a Muslim past failures of love life do not stand in the way of your getting married to a cousin.

Ex-beau wants to take revenge
2. I am a 35-year-old woman having a lesbian relationship with a 20-year-old girl. In my early twenties, I was not aware of my sexual preferences and had a relationship with a guy just for making impression on my friends. I realised that I don't get attracted to boys. When he found out, he was really mad at me and even threatened to kill me. He repeatedly urged that he loves me and I should try to understand. But I did not empathise with him and left him. Now I am going steady with my current partner, who's a gal and happy. Few days back, I met my ex-boyfriend in a mall. I tried to avoid him but he followed me to my home. He encountered me at my home and tried to get physical with me. I then hit him. He escaped but left saying that he will kill me as I have ditched him. I feel scared all the time. I don't want to lodge FIR, as I fear that my relationship will come out in open and people will know about my sexual preference. Please suggest what should I do.
Nini
Reply From Dr. Prem Lata Chawla: There is no easy solution to problems created by our own previous mistakes. Your ex-boy friend is likely to make your life at least difficult and miserable as killing you might not be all that easy. You might have to change your address, phone number etc. for hiding yourself all over again.