I was chatting with a considerably younger friend - who is, as they say at the crossroads. Too young to be taken seriously, too old to be denied "certain needs", as she put it. "And rights." It was a big problem, she sighed, finding a place where she could be alone with her boyfriend. "I have to wait for my parents to go out of town - I keep asking them to take a break, but they head out only twice a year," she cribbed. "At least I'm lucky I'm an only child and don't have siblings who'd get boyfriends/girlfriends over and fight for space with me." It's funny how some things never change. When I was in college - such a long time ago it used to be much the same story Folks in college (I went to a co-ed one - I wouldn't have it any other way) who were 'dating' went into a tizzy each time any of their friends had an Empty Pad which meant parents were out of the way (usually on vacation). Everyone and his/her girlfriend/boyfriend would want to be inside the Empty Pad, so 'bookings' had to be made well in advance. Obviously, the one boasting of the Empty Pad would be the most sought-after person in college. He or she would demand bribes like kathi roles from the canteen (which used to be pretty darn good), a video cassette of Dirty Dancing, etc, etc. It would be a damp squib thought if Empty Pad caretaker himself/herself was dating someone - in which case he or she would zealously guard territorial rights. If parents were homebodies, the sort who'd never go on a holiday, things got really desperate. Once, one of my friends overheard his mother tell someone that she was going shopping for a couple of hours. He immediately called up his girlfriend, who hid behind a pillar in front of his house till she saw Lady of the House leave with shopping bag. Unfortunately, she came back earlier than expected. As my friend opened the door to let her in (hoping he'd be able to make a case as to how one of his college friends had dropped by unannounced to share study material with him), he realised that, in his hurry (umm, to dress up), he'd put on his girlfriend's shirt. His mother: despite catching him in fagrante delicto, was rather sporting: "I think you have the wrong shirt on," she told him gently "Both of us were wearing yellow shirts - what could I do?" he ranted in college the next day. I'd once asked my mother if things had been similar when she was in college (she went to an all-girls college - her parents wouldn't have it any other way), circa mid-to-late 1960s. "In those days, most girls didn't have boyfriends," she replied guardedly. She did. I know that. Quite a few in fact. (I'm tired of my grandmother - mother's mother bragging, even now, about how many 'eligible' admirers her daughter had when she was a nubile young thing. Then, invariably, her voice turns heavy, and she says: "She chose your father in the end." Sigh.) I asked Ma how the few young women of her times - who had boyfriends - managed to spend time (alone) with The Guys. (She, of course, skilfully avoided talking about her guys). Would they, for instance, take their boyfriends, ahem, home when parents were missing? "In those days, such things never happened," she continued with her black-and-white screenplay, not letting a trace of Eastman Colour get into the frame. "Parents never went out of town without the children - so what if the children were in college and wouldn't necessarily want to vacation with mom and pop?" However, she paused, there were would be occasions when parents would go for a concert or the latest Shammi Kapoor film. Which was when... Well, yes, the girls would get boyfriends over. But no hanky panky. "How did you know?" I asked her "Because we were part of a much less degenerate generation," she snapped. Aha. E-mail author: sushmitabase@hindustantimes.com
| 
